WYSIWYG: What you see is what you get

Written by Lydia | May 20, 2015

Mental Imagery is a central skill for optimising performance and achieving goals across the spectrum of human endeavour. It is especially effective in facilitating change—whether this has to do with adapting to change; or to changing how we think, feel and act. Change of any kind doesn’t come easy. As they say, old habits die…

Don’t be Adultish!

Written by Lydia | April 23, 2015

Here’s to the virtues of being child-like (versus child-ish). Ashley Montagu articulated it so well in a Psychology Today interview which appeared way back in August 1977, entitled: “Don’t be Adultish!” [My friends at the time will remember me raving about it?] Montagu lamented the hardening of the minds of adults as they take on…

Self-interest vs Self-ish

Written by Lydia | April 2, 2015

There is a big difference between acting in your best self-interest versus being self-ish. I remember it really hitting home for the first time by a counselling psychology professor of mine at Florida State University. Wish I could remember his name! Consistently acting in your own best self-interest can only be good for others. I…

Responsible to, but not for, another

Written by Lydia | March 20, 2015

Another major distinction I like to draw attention to (re. earlier articles on being child-like vs child-ish; acting in self-interest vs being self-ish), is that we are responsible to others, but not responsible for others.  I heard this one from Dr Eng Kong Tan, a Buddhist psychiatrist/psychotherapist who is founder/director of the Metta Clinic on…

For the Love of Dog

Written by Lydia | February 20, 2015

I often like to point out to fellow dog owners in the park—when we’re engaged in extolling the many virtues of our dog friends—including how they’re the embodiment of pure love—that the word dog spelled backwards = god! Which is why I also liken the characteristic wet dog shake—to a ‘blessing’.  Not something to avoid,…

Lessons from the Dark Side: Benefits of the smoking habit

Written by Lydia | January 19, 2015

Everyone who has been to see me—knows that this is my shtick—that everything about smoking is great for your health and wellbeing. Everything, that is, sans cigarette! I submit—that it is the relaxing and rejuvenating nature of the ritual more than the nicotine stimulant that smokers are most addicted to and have difficulty giving up….

Moving on from disappointment

Written by Lydia | December 10, 2014

When facing a major disappointment – it is natural to wonder what you did wrong?  or what is wrong with you and how to fix it. There are two stumbling blocks here when you dwell on such questions. Asking: “What is wrong with me?” is not a helpful, as it both reinforces negativity and keeps…

Law of Attraction vs Non-Attachment

Written by Lydia | November 16, 2014

There is much talk about the law of attraction on the one hand, and the caution against (over) attachment to outcome on the other. Confused?  It’s about knowing what you want, and then letting go of that desire—in order to get what you want.  More confused? The message is about maintaining a balanced perspective by…